Thursday, February 11, 2010

hello graduation, hello june


now i know what it feels like stuck in a situation where you dont know what to expect and do. this is a nasty feeling! graduation is coming and i feel so eager to graduate (counting off the days to graduation). but here on the other side of the story, my.rez, demoted. life is cruel all the time. its like libra, like the third law of einstein, there is a bitter and sweet ending to everything.

he's planning to work on board come june (though it is still left hanging). i hate myself.
i really hate myself.

i feel like drowning myself and walk away the water clean (but i just cant do it). i really feel terrible. i started my morning right, doing the same routine over and over again, but this morning is pretty much different, as it had a bitter start. i guess happy endings dont come true. he'll leave me on june.

(teary eyes) i just hope that things would fall into places and life would be the same as before. i seriously dont know what to text him. i've sandwiched myself to the reality that later on, he will be working somewhere else. i hope that there will come a time that i'd be adamant. there will come a time that i will feel less and less about myself - and when that time arrives, i still dont know what to do.

let me enjoy every bit of moment that we are together (no more skypes, no more late night txts). i will have to adjust to lesser and lesser time seeing each him. fu*k!

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